http://mail.google.com/mail/? This should come through to everyone. Please feel free to copy and paste to any websites/friends that I may have missed as mom had SOOOO many.
Thank you all so much,
Heather Rowland
4342 Deerfield Dr
Sarasota, FL 34233
Heather101678@hotmail.comhttp://www.theanimalresc...120_01"><img http://www.greatergood.com/images/linktous/120_ars-jelly.jpg"></img></a></div>
Debbie’s friends,
If you all don’t know me, I am Debbie’s daughter—Heather. I am sending out this letter to update and inform everyone of my mothers’ condition and to explain the events that led up to her becoming ill.
In the beginning of December, mom was feeling ill and was having increased lower back pain. She was seen by her primary doctor (whom she finally allowed to do a complete physical after 5 years). She had multiple appointments scheduled over the next couple of weeks fro a stress test, etc.
When she went to work on Thursday, 12/4/08, she couldn’t stand to work for more than a few minutes at a time, and she had told her manager of her upcoming appointments. Her manager told her to take a couple of weeks off and sent her home early. When she came home, she was very upset and went to bed. She then pent herself up in her room for the rest of the weekend. She refused to eat and wouldn’t allow her dog to even come into her room. My brother and I tried many times to urge her to go to the ER, but she refused. After my brother went in to talk to her on Monday, 12/8, she started to hallucinate and insisted that my 3 y. o. daughter was in there and was yelling to “get her out” when in fact, my brother was the only person in the room. My brother tried to reason with her, but to no avail. My brother and I then went in and told her that we were taking her to the emergency room no matter what. Of course she refused. I then had my two sons, Tyler-11, and Lucas-9, try to convince her to go get checked out. After about 2 hours of arguing with her, she finally consented.
She was seen in the ER and finally admitted to Sarasota Memorial Hospital. At first, the doctors believed that she had a kidney infection (she only has one kidney) and started her on antibiotics, but when they did a CT scan, they discovered a large tumor in her uterus that was pressing against her kidney which was keeping it from working. They then put a tube into her kidney to help it work, which allowed her to become a little less confused. But when they did a biopsy of the tumor, they found out it was a very aggressive for of cancer. They had also noticed areas in her lungs that were the same type of cells. The cancer had not only spread to her lungs, but also to her lymph nodes.
It then became a decision of how to treat her. The tumor was so large that it was inoperable and would require chemotherapy to shrink it and the spread of the cancer would require radiation to prevent further spreading. On Christmas Eve, we met with the doctors and it was explained that due to the extent of the cancer, there was no way to treat it.
On Sunday, 12/28/08, the doctors recommended having Hospice consult with us. After my brother and I spoke with Hospice, we decided (as my mom had become completely confused) to move mom to the Hospice House of Sarasota.
Around 9pm she was transported there and was made very comfortable. In the next couple of days, her condition declined rapidly and we spent most of the time with her.
On Saturday, January 3rd, 2009, my husband and I went to visit my mom at 10 am. We spent over an hour with her and in that time, I lotioned down her feet and hands as they were very dry. (Her body had accumulated a lot of fluid because she had not had the energy to get out of the hospital bed since the day she was admitted) I also had brushed her hair and tried everything I could to try to get some kind of acknowledgement that we were there.
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Finally, as we were saying goodbye she opened her eyes and looked at both my husband and I. She never said anything as her breathing was very shallow and would have taken everything she had to even form a syllable, but the clarity in hers eyes spoke eternally.
We then came home and my grandfather and aunt went to visit with her. I then called my brother who had gone with a friend out of town and told him that he needed to get back home soon. I also called my cousin that was practically a son to my mom and told him that he needed to come down from St. Petersburg tonight. While I was on the phone with my cousin, my grandfather called to tell me that I needed to get to the Hospice House now….. But that it was too late because while he was speaking, she had taken her last breath.
I am VERY sorry to have to tell everyone that mom loved so much like this, but that is why I felt it necessary to explain all of the events as they happened. I am also sorry that it has taken this long to post this, but this has been one of the hardest things that I have ever had to deal with. I also know that this is just one of the many things that I will have to do in the up coming weeks.
My mother is being cremated, and on February 7th, 2009, my brother and I are planning to have a “Celebration of Life” ceremony,
unless we have to delay it for weather or financial reasons.
As this has been so sudden and we have had so much financial hardship, we are only requesting small donations to help pay for her cremation and ceremony. I know that many of you, as we are, are in the same financial situation and understand completely if you are unable to help, so please, only if you have it to spare! My mom would be mad if you sent money to help if you didn’t have it.
I also plan to video tape the ceremony somehow and post it for everyone to see. I have set up a “MySpace page” in honor of my mom, as her e-mail has accumulated over 5,000 messages and will take time to sift through them. The MySpace page is linked to moms’ hotmail account… debspurpledragon
Also, if you have any questions or thoughts, you can post them there. Thank you all so much for being so close to my mom. I have found that she had MANY friends!
Sending everyone the best wishes and warmest regards,
Heather Rowland, loving and devoted daughter
4342 Deerfield Drive
Sarasota, FL 34233
941-915-8084 or e-mail:
Heather101678@hotmail.com
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Mommemorial.pdf
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